I'm a pain to live with. I know it. I like everything straight and uncluttered in our public areas... the lounge and kitchen. My wife has patiently (or not sometimes!) put up with me like this for nearly 40 years.

Our favorite in-house banter goes like this.

Her: "I'm NOT putting the bread away now to please you - I may still want another slice later!"

Me: "That Swiss finishing school certainly hasn't done you any favors."

Come to think of it, she rarely laughs any more at that one, so maybe I have to change the punch line :)

My attitude is not my fault. I had the dubious honor of being brought up poor, but in my teens I was trained as rich. For example, my two delightful elderly aunts, long passed now, would lecture me on my eating whenever I visited.

These old-fashioned wealthy spinsters would advise me matter of factly... "You can always tell if someone has been brought up properly by the way they hold their knife at the dinner table."

I'll describe how you too can enter the hallowed portals of good manners in a minute, but first I want to tell you why it matters...

This is not an article about smoking. But smoking is a drag. It costs a lot, makes your breath stink - and may ultimately stop you from winning the 100 yard dash to the bus stop.

I smoked, but stopped 37 years ago.

My mother smoked until well into her 50's. Even as a logical and intelligent woman knowing the dangers she faced, this made no difference... she was gripped by this addiction and it was wrecking her life.

So as a last resort - she visited a hypnotherapist. Back then, 40 years ago, therapeutic hypnotism was almost a voodoo art.

And maybe this happened:

Imagine your life as a boat ride. You are born... the boat gets champagne cracked across its bow. Ouch. Well, that's not fair.

Then you slide backwards into the harbor. Yes, we all start out life sliding backwards, not really knowing what is going on behind us.

After a period of testing in the kindergarten/harbor, we strike out for the open seas. That's about our teenage time, into turbulent waters for sure.

Then it's all about endurance... plunging headlong into stormy waves that represent the world and all its challenges.

A long time goes by when we only see flotsam and jetsam, birds and the occasional whale.

Life's like that too... lots of boring activity with some infrequent excitement scattered about.

Then - a port! Could be our first overseas trip, getting married, or or first job.

Followed by more seafaring boredom.

Then another port, sea, then another port. But never close enough to maintain our interest.

Life floats on by for a while. Then we hit an iceberg and sink.

OK, let's stop here before its gets a little messy :)

Guess the missing component here...

I was a recreational motorcyclist for many years. But never again.

I'll tell you why in a minute.

First, I should explain that for the best part of 25 years, rain and shine, I went to work on one, rode round the weekends on one, visited places on one, rode in groups (not that often) on one.

I even rode across the Nullabor plains in Australia on one.

And I had a funny attitude to motorcycling. I wasn't content to just ride around the place, startling grandmothers and scaring young children (not really, that's just to make me sound interesting... when in fact I'm quite boring).

No, I was a perfectionist.

I rode like a policeman on a training course. I had a routine... I had to ride to a stop before putting one foot down. My cornering was precise. I rode fast but extremely defensively... always looking for an escape route, headlights on, all of it.

And it worked... I only had one accident in all those years, a quarter century of riding. The small scar on my cheek - I tell anyone remotely interested - was from wrestling a bear in a Russian forest. (I later changed that to saving a diplomat's young child from a pack of savage bears on a mountain - it got more sympathy).

Nowadays I prefer the comfort and safety of cars... and the more luxurious the better, as you've read in my previous articles. I've owned everything from an Aston Martin to classic sports cars, utilities and luxury saloons like the Lexus hybrid, the LS600hL. Former Beatle Paul McCartney had one of those... I'm in good company, but better off since I didn't get it airfreighted to me :)

What made the change?

"I went to Monaco in my shirtsleeves?" After all, doesn't everyone wear short sleeved shirts there, in the south of France?

Well, I did it differently. In fact, yesterday I traveled from Britain - where I was visiting - all the way down to the bottom of France.

A 2 hour flight.

I caught a helicopter at Nice Airport, and flew in to Monaco over the sea. A 7 minute flight.

Monaco - the heart of James Bond's casino, home to billionaires, exotic cars and the most expensive real estate in the world. And I enjoyed every manicured inch of it immensely.

Then at the end of that day, I caught another helicopter back to the airport, and traveled all the way back to UK. In my shirtsleeves. No coat, no bags.

I simply put my passport and wallet into one trouser pocket, my iPhone into another, and travelled light - thousands of kilometers across the world. Packed it all into one day and it was an adventure. I was able to do it because the weather was predicted to be quite hot, so I didn't want to carry a coat with me.

I didn't need anything else - I could always buy food, clothing or anything I needed on the way.

And the trip was a resounding success.

But there was one place I didn't visit during my time there, and it will surprise you...

He stared at the tv screen in disbelief. The last number dropped out of the lottery barrel... and he knew he and his wife's days as house renters were over.

One million dollars... all theirs... to BUY the house they wanted, upgrade the car, travel more often.

He had planned this for years and knew exactly where the money would be spent. And one of his first moves would be to ring Ken Silver and tell him that the Silver Lotto System had struck gold!

Then he remembered, and slapped his forehead with shock and annoyance...

I almost crashed into a giant 18-wheeler truck a few minutes ago.

My wife said - not that calmly...in fact, in a slight panic - "It's turning, it's turning!" as I barreled down the side of this enormous behemoth. The truck gave a mighty blast on its horn as it started turning across our lane.

And on the spot, I invented a new phrase: Situational Blindness.

My wife would have called it - and me - several different names, but thankfully she stopped when I put on the brakes and saved us.

How could I miss that truck about to turn? I asked myself that question as I was driving home.

After all, the truck had indicators blinking, several of them - all the way down the side. And it was turning slightly as I came through.

But I took no notice because I assumed he wouldn't make the turn.

And here's where I went askew...

First, a little explanation...

I have 2 identical blogs. Well, this one is prettier than the other, but the writing and content is the same on both.

One is a backup to the other.

One started in 2004, the other September 8th this year. Yep, last month.

I'm taking the most-read figures from the most recent one, because people love up-to-date stuff. So I took the highest-read posts (which are my newsletters, since I put them up on the blog straight after), and here they are:

I answer the doorbell. Two plumbers are standing there, smiling. "We've come to install your new bathroom basins," said Graham, and I invite them inside.

An hour passes and the bell goes again.

"Hi," said the taller of the two men standing there, "We're here to put in your new shower glass."

I point them in the direction of the bathrooms, and leave them to work.

As I sip a cup of green tea I can hear them whistling, and from the floor below I can hear banging as the plumbers get on with installing the sinks.

And by the end of the day they're finished and the bathrooms look superb.

The next day I saunter down to my local lottery store and make small talk with Rabib as he puts my tickets through the machine.

Rabib is an overweight version of the drugstore owner in the Simpsons cartoon. Except his English is very poor...we barely understand each other.

He's good at counting out prizes though...done that often over the years.

And so the next day I go down to put my tickets through the machine checker.

Want to know how to get mind-bogglingly r.i.c.h - quicker than anyone in your street, or town?

It's sort of easy.

The Secret Formula To Wealth is simply this:

At any random time throughout your life, most stuff will sell for a song. Here's some extreme examples...

- The latest figures out on the prices of American high end luxury residences show mansion prices are dropping. Celebrity real estate suffers the most because these stars buy homes as soon as they get a check from their latest film - not when it's the best time to buy.

- That exotic Ferrari will be sold at a knockdown price because the economy is in a spin and the owner wants cash fast. Happened in our country last weekend to a property developer.

- Aaron Spelling's monster mansion in California was on the market for $150 million, and languished there for 28 months before being bought recently by Petra Ecclestone for a mere $85 million.

- That popular artist will die one day, and suddenly his paintings will rocket in value. Get in ahead and you're in clover.

- If you wait long enough, tomatoes will eventually fall to half their price. As the food buyer in our house, I know this.

So almost anything can be bought at a huge discount - at the right time. All you have to do is:

Someone wise - wielding a calculator, obviously - said that the internet now is sooooo big, we cannot read even a fraction of it in our entire lifetime.

Even speed-reading 24 hours a day while being spoon fed by a dedicated chef. It's a knowledge monster.

So I thought I'd bring a selected 5 of the the most interesting bits to you this morning. Some good - some not so sunny... just like life itself: